Saturday, October 19, 2013

30 Something...

So, I’m turning 30 this year and I’m not all too excited about it.  However, since becoming older I have found myself day dreaming (mostly driving to and from work since I have an hour plus commute) looking back on life and appreciating all that I have.  For starters I think about my lovely wife, Sarah.  Sometimes I just look at her and can’t believe I have found such an incredible sole mate.  One who always stands by my side regardless of the situation or crazy ideas of things I want to try or do.  Next I start thinking about my two beautiful daughters followed by the two incredible jobs I have.  Not just any old jobs, but jobs I am excited to be at and get up for every morning.

When you find your perfect soul mate you learn that when you work together as a team you are unstoppable.  When one person feels down, the other person picks you up and vice versa.  There are plenty of obstacles that Sarah and I have encountered in the 7 years we have been together, but never once did we look at each other and say, “We can’t do this”, or “We’re not going to make it”.  Rather, we turned to each other and said “How can we get around / over this obstacle”.  So any time we are faced with a challenge I always feel good knowing that we are going to make it.

The truth of the matter is relationships are work.  Doesn’t matter if you are boyfriend / girlfriend, engaged, married, a gay couple, long distance relationship – its work.  A relationship will only survive if both people in the relationship are willing to fight for it.  As soon as you don’t have that push and pull from your significant other, your relationship will fall apart.  There is not a perfect “cookie cutter” relationship out there.  Every relationship has its arguments and disagreements.  If you hear a couple say to you “they never argue”, it’s either complete bullshit or they are still in the “puppy love” stages.  Don’t worry, they will learn quickly.  Sarah and I have our disagreements, but it’s always over something we both feel passionately about.  Sometimes I want to watch the Bruins game, and Sarah wants to watch Glee (Haha!).

I may sometimes seem to be strong willed or be able to hold my emotions back from any given situation, but as I have become older it’s starting to get harder to hold my emotions back.  Maybe it’s because I’m a parent now, or maybe I’m becoming a wuss in my old age.  A perfect example is about 2 months ago when I was putting Teagan to bed in our apartment alone.  Sarah and Hadley weren’t home yet because Hadley had just been born the day before and they were still in the hospital.  Teagan was asking to give Mommy and Hadley a kiss goodnight.  When I told her that they would be home tomorrow she just broke down in tears – This is just about when I started to lose it.  Of course, a daddy always wants to remain strong for his kids, but I ended up in tears while laying on Teagan’s bedroom floor to keep her company while she fell asleep.  I was sad because I felt like my family was split in two – half in the hospital and half at home and I wanted to be in both spots to take care of my family.  Needless to say, I hope I don’t have to be put back into that situation again anytime soon.  On a brighter note, it also made me realize just how big and smart Teagan is getting.  She understands what it is like to love and be loved.  To me, that was the silver lining of the situation.

When I look at Hadley and think that Teagan was once her size I can’t help but wonder where time has gone?  It seems like just yesterday we brought Teagan home from the hospital.  Now she is telling me what she likes, doesn’t like, what TV show she wants to watch, and when she doesn’t want to be tickled any more.  Not only that, but she is becoming witty at only two and a half years old.  Remember I mentioned in a previous blog post that Teagan is a bit of a smart ass?  Well, at school, Teagan has learned about using her manners, which I must say she is really good at.  However, she tends to use them to her advantage.  For example, I will ask her to do something that I really NEED her to do and she politely turns to me (or Sarah for that matter) and says with the most innocent face you have ever seen, “Ummm, no thank you!”  How are you supposed to argue with that?  I think Sarah and I are in for it as Teagan becomes older.

And of course, I can’t forget to speak (or write rather) about Hadley, or Hads-magoo, or Hadley-Snugglemonster, or as Teagan sometimes refers to her, Hadley-goo.  Just two weeks ago, on Thursday, she showed her first smile.  I was working from home and Sarah needed to run an errand so Hadley and I were hanging out.  Ok, maybe not exactly hanging out, but she was busy being loud and yelling playing on her play mat while daddy was busy working.  Of course with any newborn comes spit-up.  As I glanced over to Hadley to check on her I saw that she had spit-up and christened her play mat for the 1,000th time.  So jumped up out of my chair and leaned down to wipe the spit-up off of her mouth and off of her play mat.  Just as I finished she looked right at me and smiled!  Talk about moments that take your breath away.  There is just nothing quite like it.  It’s one of those special moments that parents get to share in bringing a new child into the world.  Hads-magoo now smiles non-stop.  She is especially cute when she wakes up at 4:00am to be fed and smiles (sense sarcasm here).  It’s quite the adventure being a parent, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.